We all have pet peeves. I have a couple. One of the most interesting ones that I have ever come across is being paired off with one of my male friends. Once I flash a smile or I seem extra nice to a member of the opposite sex in my age range, automatically I am assumed to be in a relationship. 

I am not sure when society started to propagate this unwritten, yet unnecessary rule. I am often caught in the crosshairs of assumptions based on my personality (and dare I say, calling). I think about it on numerous occasions. Why does this always happen? Can persons of the opposite sex really be just friends?  

Point blank, yes. Although many friends end up building a life together, history has indicated that this is possible. We can honour and cherish people without a desire for sexual intimacy. There is room for this. However, both parties must put boundaries in place to ensure that this happens. Persons must also be disciplined enough to maintain these boundaries so that the friendship may grow and develop.  

We also need people of the opposite sex to be “just” friends. This means friends who will treat us right and fair. In this context, I am referring to individuals who will hold us accountable. They will praise us when we are right, and gently reprimand us when we are wrong. We grow in conversation when we hear different perspectives on various subject matters. We need to do the same for our friends.  

An incredibly good friend of mine often reminds me that people will always assume. At some point, motives will be misinterpreted. My intention is not to change my personality to suit society’s perspectives. In fact, our friendships will be ruined if we listen to the noise of the crowd rather than the advice of a selected few who value us. After all, I am no puppet in this world. You should not be one either. 

^{Photo by Anna Might (IG:@annamighttakepics)}